Horrortoberfest ’18 Day 2 – Galaxy of Terror (1981)
Today’s movie ended up having a connection to yesterday’s. There was actually a poster for this movie hanging in the background of Chopping Mall. Who knows, maybe I’ll just do […]
Tag Archives: movie review
Horrortoberfest ’18 Day 1 – Chopping Mall (1986)
The grand return of Horrortoberfest starts with a classic shitty 80’s horror film that I had, up until this point, managed to somehow not see. The basic premise is that […]
In Theaters Now – The Predator
Once again, an alien species of hunters comes to Earth but this time it’s not trophies that they’re after. Can our ragtag crew of soldiers with PTSD, a biologist, and […]
Movie Mastery – Moontrap: Target Earth (2017)
The movie cover shows giant fighting robots and the back promises a story of time travel and a dire rush to save the Earth. The movie delivers repeating exposition in […]
In Theaters Now – Slender Man (2018)
A terrifying internet meme comes to life and turns out to basically be if The Ring was about incredibly annoying teenagers. Also, instead of being a creepy background figure, Slender […]
Movie Mastery – Crash & Burn (1990)
In the distant future of 2030, Earth is ravaged by the depletion of the ozone layer and one corporation holds power over everyone. Also, there are giant, sad-looking robots that […]
In Theaters Now – Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again
It’s time to revisit the magical island paradise where rich white people sing and dance their cares away while the local Greeks toil in the background. In this prequel/sequel mash-up […]
Movie Mastery – DOA: Dead or Alive (2006)
It’s a movie based on a video game that is pretty much only known for the fact that the boobs would jiggle. You can probably guess what the movie’s cinematography […]
In Theaters Now – Hereditary
We went a little overboard talking about the latest critical darling of the horror world. Did we talk for almost an hour and forty minutes because we loved it or […]
Movie Mastery – Solo (1996)
After the Deadpool 2 review, everyone was asking if we would also review Solo. We here at System Mastery podcasts are nothing if not open to listening to the desires […]
In Theaters Now – Deadpool 2
Once again, Jon is joined by Quinn and Josette from the Swallows of the South podcast to provide our thoughts on Deadpool 2. Though mostly it’s our thoughts on weird […]
Movie Mastery – The Core (2003)
It’s another week of special guest hosts but this time you get twice the guests for half the cost! Jo and Quinn join in watching a disaster movie with probably […]
In Theaters Now – Avengers: Infinity War
You didn’t vote for it but we went to see it anyway. It’s anarchy here over at Movie Mastery studios. Jef is gone and has been replaced by fan favorite, […]
Movie Mastery – The ALF Movie (1987)
Hah! He kills us. This almost embarrassingly cheap TV special takes Alf on a grand tour of… some B-roll footage of Chicago. We meet ALF’s brother Mitch (yes, we know […]
Movie Mastery – Theodore Rex (1995)
After the release of Jurassic Park, dinosaur mania was sweeping the nation. The people wanted dinosaurs and they didn’t care how they got them. Then along came this putrid attempt […]
Movie Mastery – Helldriver (2010)
It’s like someone took the storyboard for an amazing, nutty zombie movie and then let the most boring person alive edit it. If you thought that the one thing that […]
In Theaters Now – Black Panther
From the bottom of our heart shaped plants, thank you for voting for this over Fifty Shades this month. It is a rare occasion that we get to see and […]
In Theaters Now – Maze Runner: The Death Cure
In a world where every post apocalypse scenario has come to pass, only a handful of plucky kids can save the day. Can the mega corporation with the dumbest acronym […]
Movie Mastery – Guardians (2017)
It’s time for some superhero action from the Motherland. Russia’s greatest/only heroes must band together to stop the machinations of the evil Dr. Electro-Bane. It’s like if the Fantastic Four […]
Movie Mastery – Suburban Commando (1991)
There was a time when Hollywood was trying really hard to turn Hulk Hogan into a legit movie star. With films like this, though, they skipped the standard process […]
