Expounded Universe 9 – Fully Armed and Operational Molestation
In today’s episode, Princess Leia is sexually assaulted by a big red lizard man. Everyone else who shows up at all just spins their wheels. Dash Rendar isn’t even here. […]
Author Archives: systemmastery
Living Steel – System Mastery 104
Brought to you by rocket scientists hellbent on pure unadulterated realism, Living Steel is basically Heinlein by way of Games Workshop, with probably a few too many tables (which is […]
In Theaters Now – It (2017)
Something evil is haunting the town of Derry, Maine. It’s a clown that really likes fucking with the protagonists. Can Jon overcome his love of the original Tim Curry It? […]
Expounded Universe 8 – Guri Interrupted
In this episode everyone but Luke spins their wheels and so does he, honestly. Got Star Wars questions? We’ve got answers. Send them to the usual place, systemmastery@gmail.com.
Gear Krieg- System Mastery 103
Are you looking for a game of two-fisted derring-do and rousing pulp adventure? You’ll be sure to find it in some other book. Gear Krieg is an RPG companion to […]
Movie Mastery – The 13th Warrior (1999)
It turns out that not every single person that makes a suggestion for the show ends up trying to get us to watch the absolute worst nonsense available. This time […]
Expounded Universe 7 – The Rodian Less Twaveled
Chapters 19 – 21. In which Dash Rendar gets a real wicked sad going, Leia finally meets Guri, and against all odds, Bothans just keep on dying! Got Star Wars […]
Gamma Crawl X – Episode 4
Oh my goodness after a long hiatus the adventure continues. I mean, sort of. We recorded this a long time ago. In a measurement system I call “Broken Computers,” we […]
King Arthur: Pendragon – System Mastery 102
Yay, a game we didn’t hate! This is a very specific sort of RPG, in which you play as a knightly dynasty during the Morte D’Arthur romantic tales. Will you […]
Movie Mastery – In The Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale (2006)
At some point in time Uwe Boll watched The Lord of the Rings and thought to himself, “Hey, I could do that.” Using the barest connection to a video game […]
Expounded Universe 6 – The Life and Death of Manny Bothans
In which Dash Rendar slowly turns into that kid that gets birthday presents at your birthday party, Vader and the Emperor make the briefest possible appearances, and Leia ponders the […]
A State – System Mastery 101
This book is a grim, unrelenting slog. Punctuated by the kind of art that would be impressive if this book was a collection of screenshots from the first Fallout game, […]
In Theaters Now – The Dark Tower
There are other worlds than these. In one of those worlds, there was probably an adaptation of this well beloved series that received critical acclaim and went on to be […]
Expounded Universe 5 – Horkin’ Up Dangle Hams
Welcome to the majesty of chapters 13-15. In which our hero Prince Xizor capers and cavorts about most evilly, Luke does some canyon racing, Threepio belabors the joke, and … […]
D&D 3rd Edition – System Mastery 100
Well, it’s been four years. Honestly when we started the gimmick of doing D&D every 25 episodes we never thought we’d actually get as far as third edition. Here we […]
In Theaters Now – Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets
Most of your favorite sci-fi has likely borrowed something from the hugely influential comic series Valerian and Laureline. Now see the adaptation of the source material that has the bravery […]
Expounded Universe 4 – Stupid Sexy Xizor
These chapters are in a bit of a holding pattern, but not us, damn it! We discuss the value of Xizor’s workout regimen, Dash Rendar’s continued value as an employee, […]
Gamma Crawl X – Episode 3
This time on the continuing adventures of Occulus Vive, Teddy Rustbin, and Yu-go the Nyarlathotank we find our heroes faced with a fiendish trap and pitted against the fiendish Bird […]
Sailor Moon RPG – System Mastery 99
Moon Prism Power! Right? Right? That’s what she says sometimes? Look this is weird for us. Not our usual thing. So we brought in a ringer! A guy that’s watched […]
Movie Mastery – Rock-a-Doodle (1992)
Get ready for an animated musical that features all of your favorite things from the genre including: Songs that last 10 seconds, useless main characters, and a total lack of […]
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